It all started last week when our son had an autistic moment, and my husband shouted at him to calm down. We tried to go into town but he was having none of it. He got out the car then started getting really anxious. I knew straight away it wasn’t going to happen, and so did my husband, but husband isn’t coping well with these outbursts and said “we can’t do anything anymore”. I remained quiet. It takes me all my energy to deal with my son, I can’t deal with a grown man too! This led to a full blown argument when we got home. I won’t go in to all the sordid details, but I’ve been feeling really low since.
Is this my life now? Firefighting constantly!
Husband gets annoyed with himself for acting that way. But it’s getting more and more regular. Our son is having more and more autistic moments as he is getting older and becoming more aware of everything.
A friend in work I was talking to yesterday messaged me last night to ask if I was ok as I was a bit flat and not my usual self. I thought I was hiding it well lol! She is one of the very few people who know about the diagnosis.
I still don’t feel myself. I can’t put it into words. I feel down and on the verge of crying and I just feel like being on my own.
Yesterday at lunch time I went to a coffee shop myself and just sat staring into space. I needed to be alone.
For someone who is a chatterbox, I just don’t feel like talking just now.
Super Autism Mum 